Round is a shape….

…it is just not the shape that I would like to be in.

I gained 36 pounds while pregnant with Sunshine.  I lost all of that weight two weeks ago courtesy of breastfeeding.  However, it is now my sixth postnatal week and the scale has not moved one iota – despite needing to lose an extra 30 pounds I have put on since the initial freshman 15.  The good news is that this is the first week that I can actually get back into a regular exercise routine safely.  My body should be close to, if not totally, healed.

I’ve never wanted to be skinny; I’ve always wanted to be fit and healthy.  I am constantly reading fitness magazines envying the models.  I want to look like that.  I always have excuses though.  Before and after my first pregnancy, I exercised quite a bit and ate clean when at home (keep reading below).  I ran and attended Booty Camp and MissFit classes twice a week but I never did see the results I wanted. I never fully committed because I had it at the back of my mind that I was just going to get pregnant again.  Well, guess what?  That excuse doesn’t work anymore.  I am not going to get pregnant again.  Two kids are enough for this couple.  Now is the time to commit, it’s just been so hard because I need a detox.

I have been eating so much junk lately.  I get super snacky at night and I tend to eat a lot of chips and chocolate.  I was also eating ice cream until I determined that Sunshine’s tummy didn’t like when I consumed cow’s milk.  I had a stash of chocolate in my purse like my Granny <photographic proof>.  She would have had Coffee Crisp in there though.  I need to break this cycle because I feel like a sack of shit at the end of the night.  I’ve been slowly getting back into things though – I’ve been drinking more water and avoiding restaurants and take out.  Restaurants and take out ruined my efforts when I was running and taking classes (see above).  I made the effort to plan my menus and eat clean but I didn’t prepare my meals ahead of time.  I just didn’t feel like making the meals after crawling in the door after my 1.5 hour commute home from work in the city all day.

I’m a planner though so it is easy for me to write out shopping lists, meals, and exercise routines.  I just have to start up my plans again and actually do what is on the paper.  With the two kids now I think I am going to have to prep and/or my meals in one day that Fuzz is off work.  I enjoy cooking so it shouldn’t be a problem. 

I’m also a goal-oriented person though, so I should probably pick something and work toward it.  I would love to finally start running races like my marathon-running parents.  Maybe one day I can conquer my fear of water monsters (yes, like Nessie – don’t judge) to swim in open water to complete a triathalon.

So I’ve put it out in the blogosphere.  I need to start back at it and you can all hold me to it.  If you see me with that chocolate bar, tell me to put it down and back away.

I’m actually feeling rather snacky right now but I will do the right thing and make myself a protein smoothie…with chocolate powder.



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